Michal Neuvirth
Dwayne Roloson
Goaltender, simply put, is the coolest fucking position in all of fucking sports. A battle-clad warrior sworn to the task of protecting his crease and, more importantly, the area behind it.
A goaltender who has mastered his craft can turn a mediocre team into a playoff contender. On the other side of the coin, a goaltender who wears his pads with little honor, can turn a playoff contender into something far less prestigious.
So for now, we’re going to ignore everything on the open ice between the two creases, and look at the unique goaltending matchup between Michal Neuvirth and Dwayne Roloson. Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader. Oedipus and Laius.
This, my friends, is god damn classic. You’ll have NHL fans rooting for the old guy to make a Favre-like last-hoorah run for the cup. Then you’ll have other fans who want to see the new star steal the glory during his first romp through the postseason. Us? We just want the fucking Caps to win. God damn!
Dwayne Roloson is your Aragorn son of Arathorn type warrior: rugged and battlescarred, yet somber and unassuming. He immediately brought a spark to this Lightning team, earning four shutouts in his first eleven starts after being brought over in a trade with the New York Islanders. The first of those shutouts came against Washington. The next time he saw the Caps he did it again. Starting tomorrow night, Roloson will look to add a few more links to his chain of shutouts.
On the other side of the ice, Michal Neuvirth is like Atreyu, full of promise, but already to shoulder the burden of a full-fledged hero. He was the Capitals go-to goalie for the majority of the season, but when Bruce needed to make a change Semyon Varlamov and Braden Holtby were never far. But, like a true hero, Neuvirth emerged from the battle that was the regular season. But his initial test was yet to be had.
So Boudreau through him into the midst of the battlefield, plunging him into an arena of blood and viscera flying rubber discs. The stakes were raised, the Capitals playoff lives at stake, and with one the NHL’s best minding the pipes on the other end of the ice. But young Atreyu Neuvy (not without considerable aid from MJS, myself, and other contributing friends) again emerged victorious, and now he is put forth before a new, and fiercer round of competitors.
I could throw stats down your number-guzzling throats, but career statistics don’t interest us much (not to mention the unbalanced depth of them). What does grab our attention are the classic implications in this goaltender battle. Even if Neuvy were to become the ultimate hero, would his playoff beard reach the Gondorian levels of Aragorn’s Roloson’s. Will the old-man’s battle-tested wits remain stout as steel in the face of second round action? Will the novice’s?
Look, we’re not stupid. We know that there is a lot more to this series than the men between the pipes, and with two teams built like the Caps and the Lightning it’s more likely than not that the skaters are going to decide this series. But Neuvy-Roli is going to be fun to watch and fun to follow. We’re rooting for our little Thundercat…and we’re rooting for him to put an end to what us probably the last of Roloson’s 9 lives.
On a completely unrelated note…if you hate Mike Milbury you should probably click here.
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